on a bullet train to Kyoto.

We woke up the third day and decided that if we ignored the sounds of our bank accounts protesting long enough, that they would stop whining altogether. We put this theory to the test by trying out the $30 breakfast buffet. Oh...my...fucking...god. They have the best fruit I have ever eaten in my life. Cantaloupe that is easily the best I have ever tasted, and an unknown melon that gives the flavor to my melon pan bread lust. I decided to try and make up the $30 in fruit while Scott took his fury out on the bacon. Did I mention the orange juice? It wasn't orange juice, it was ambrosia. The nectar of the Gods has been found in Japan. Look for it in headlines. Drinking this juice was like biting into an orange, only it was liquid. Even fresh squeezed orange juice doesn't taste as much like an orange as this juice does. I'm not even sure oranges do. After breakfast, our servers bowed to us and thanked us for coming, completely unaware of the brutal massacre that fell upon their buffet and their profits.

After breakfast we decided we had had enough of trying to make sense of Tokyo, so we hopped on the Shinkansen for Kyoto. Traveling at 177mph through the gorgeous countryside, and houses with roof tiles in an array of colors that would make members of any home owner's association go into cardiac arrest, we arrived at Kyoto Station a mere two hours and 40 minutes later. Riding in the first class Green cars is the only way to travel long distances in Japan. That is unless you didn't get enough of the fiery hell that is economy class on the plane flight to Japan. I do however recommend that you make reservations or you will end up getting comfortable and then having to move multiple times like we did. Fortunately, everybody was very nice about it and the hostess kept giving us more towelettes to clean our hands. Mine were so clean you could see yourself in them by the time we reached Kyoto.

Realizing that we went to Kyoto on a whim and that we had no idea what we wanted to do, let alone what there was to do in Kyoto, we set out to find a map. Many Japanese maps and 30 minutes of arguing later, we finally found a map. But the fun didn't stop there. Finally agreeing on what to do, we decide that the Kyoto Imperial Palace is the place to go. As we cheerily set out, we completely ignored the landmarks given to us by the map, and proceed to walk over a mile in the wrong direction. After a very silent walk back to the station, we decide to eat lunch at a local ramen shop where I manage to splash soup all over my shirt. And this soup doesn't just dry up without a trace. Why would it? The Kyoto trip was going so well already! I then spend the rest of the day walking through busy metropolitan Kyoto with stains on my shirt that look like I have a drooling problem.

After lunch, we set out in the correct direction. By the end of the first block we reached the Nichi-Honganji Temple. This temple is massive, and the complex it sits in is very large, but as we found out later, this was yet another small fry in the temple game. We meant to go inside of the temple, but a flock of pigeons took it upon themselves to bird strike us. Japanese pigeons have balls...and they hit Scott in the face. After leaving the temple, the Kyoto Imperial Palace was an easy 5 blister filled miles through excruciating humidity. Despite threats of death and secession from our feet we made it to the palace in about an hour and a half. And we only had to stop for bandaids once!

The Kyoto Imperial Palace is easily four square miles in area, and has roughly 10-12 buildings on the complex. It is massive, but beautiful. The area is filled with homes and various buildings that are centuries old, lakes filled with carp and turtles, wide open expanses and parks. Oh, and lets not forget the cats that lick their privates and the Japanese men who are fascinated by it. We got to the palace at closing so we weren't actually allowed to go in the emperor's former home and take pictures, but just visiting the grounds was good enough.

Kyoto was great, as my thumbs up communicates, and we wanted to spend more time walking around, but our feet were screaming louder than normal and they seemed like they really meant it. So we decided it would be a good idea to take the subway back to Kyoto Station. Fortunately there was an entrance right in front of the Palace, and a very nice old man who helped us figure out how much we had to pay since there were multiple prices for each stop and no English.

We hopped on the next shinkansen back to Tokyo for another relaxing 3 hours in the gloriously well air conditioned green car. Through a lapse in my attention span Scott got the window seat, so all of the cool scenery that I saw was unable to be photographed. Houses nestled into every nook and cranny of a mountain. Local graveyards interwoven with forest, minus all the creepiness that is usually associated with such things. Beach cities and lots of forest dominated islands. No photographs of those amazing sights, just my bandaged feet. I would show you the blisters, but seeing as how they are in between toes and on the balls of my feet they are not easy to photograph. That and the lighting in our hotel room is crap for that sort of thing.

For dinner we went to Mos Burger again where I tried what they are famous for, a Mos Burger (a.k.a. cheeseburger) and melon soda. I am quickly developing an obsession for melon flavored anything. I entertained the notion of buying a shirt that said "I love melons" but decided against it on the premise that everyone would misunderstand its meaning. One thing that I have noticed about Japan is that they don't offer condiments at their restaurants. I think it is assumed that everything you need comes with your order, and you can go to hell if you want anything else. Another difference is the lack of trash cans in every city we visit. There are vending machines every 100 feet or less but no trash cans. I see Japanese people buy drinks all the time, but I never see one carrying an empty bottle for miles like I do. Finding a trash can is like finding Shangri-la, I'm sure they only exist in myth. Despite the complete and utter lack of trash cans the streets and the sidewalks are cleaner than America. I am still not sure how this works out. For more pictures of the Kyoto trip see the post above.